short time to do

Jun M - O FIM [2:25] - Strangers

david byrne radio

Takagi Masakatsu - Bloomy Girls [Live] [5:40] - Private/Public

Wanting to get something done with the last hour of work, here. But this damn music is too epic and beautiful for me to not feel like I'm flying.

chopin

Listening to Preludes, Op. 28 No. 2. And it's soothing the WANT right out of me, for the moment. But I'm sure it'll only be for a moment. I have plenty to do tonight. Many tasks set before me. E-mails, mostly. About an ART party next Monday, that I want to throw.

And there's a shower that I need to take.

And some web design stuff that I should think about, and maybe even do. Maybe, while I work, I'll watch an episode of Heroes. Or Lost. Or some other mind-numbing morsel of escapism. Because, yes, I need to escape from the consequences of my actual desires, which I am unable to deal with at the moment.

And speaking of dealing with things: I'm not sure that I feel comfortable blogging freely here, where people might see, about my desires. There are some February happenings regarding Lust and Lack-ThereOf that I would rather not discuss in public.

So I will be blogging privately and publicly, this month. What I deem appropriate will trickle down to this blog. I hope that is not offensive, but it is necessary in order to maintain my ego, and I cannot afford to dissolve that in this economic climate.

This is one of the challenges that I am confronting by trying this whole National Blog Posting Month thing again. My ego, el Censore, often stops me from communicating at all. Everything is private. Every word might make me vulnerable, might end up coming back to bite me in the ass.

Nina Simone is playing now. One of my favorite thing in the world: giant playlists on random.

Ok, I'll talk about it, I'll make myself vulnerable, there was this girl . . . on Tuesday. And it was less than spectacular. Maybe my lowest point, actually, if I'll allow my ego to judge myself and my situation for a second.

I was not immediately attracted to her, but felt obligated to give it a shot anyway. The attraction did not grow. She'll never read this, don't worry. She'll never know about my judgement. That's what I'm telling myself. And in all likelihood, she won't. So what's the big deal?

I guess I bring it up because it makes me want to just GIVE UP on desire. Give up on relationships. Give up on sex. I won't, of course, not completely but I have been considering it for many moments of the day. And so, as I do, I must shower it all off, work on my stuff, watch things all night, and continue to move forward.

What comes is better than what came before.

Chan Marshall

You put yourself upon a big stool
Nothin' worse than an educated fool
Talkin' sex is your favorite conversation
But peace and love is a famous generation
What's in your head has really started showing
your conversation gettin' kinda boring

Nina Simone, in Balm in Gilead

National Blog Positing Month

In february, I will be trying to post to this blog every day for National Blog Posting Month (which is now every month, just like the revolution begins every day). Might as well get a head start and post through the end of january . . .

Projects I am currently working on:

• fronterafest play


• american buffalo


• this week tonight


• elephantzgerald


• exquisitezombies


• a full-time job!

stuff

did some work on the pathfinder, which it seems is no where near done yet, pinpointed a spot where i should start working on it again -- and now i think i should move on to something else, maybe. that pathfinder will plague me.

is finally gonna see the Dark Knight tonight

is now updating with PING.FM

calling all artists

please glance over this list of art assets that we will be needing in the very near future for our VIDEO GAME and see if anything strikes your fancy:
http://www.ferstenfeld.com/mediawiki/index.php?title=Art_Assets

doodle, dawdle, sketch, scan, paint, photograph, write — we need it all!



the story of our game so far can be read here:
http://www.ferstenfeld.com/mediawiki/index.php?title=The_Department_of_Death#The_Story

and additional assignements can be found here:
http://www.ferstenfeld.com/mediawiki/index.php?title=The_Department_of_Death#Assignments


if anything at all inspires you to create something, let us know!

and feel free to upload:
http://www.ferstenfeld.com/mediawiki/index.php?title=Special:Upload

or add to our wiki:
http://www.ferstenfeld.com/mediawiki/index.php?title=The_Department_of_Death


happy creating,
sinceriously yours,
the dead prez